THE MALE EXPERIENCE OF SEXUAL TRAUMA:
National online HELPLINE for men who were sexually abused or assaulted
At least 1 in 6 males report having been sexually abused before the age of sixteen. That data translates to more than 17 million men in America alone. Many of them never tell anyone, because they don’t realize that early sexual coercion by women or older men is actually abuse. Most blame themselves and feel overwhelming shame that they didn’t say No or try to get away from the offender. Men who were sexually assaulted when young may suffer from the same type of emotional problems, depression, addictions, and PTSD as women who were assaulted in childhood. It is not uncommon for men who have experienced child sexual abuse to have to deal with suicidal thoughts. If suicidal thoughts go unchallenged, they can convince a man that because it is tough now, it will always be that way. But if there is an opportunity to talk about suicidal thoughts, it can help a man to better understand what connections he values and the dreams and aspirations he has for life. In order for such conversation to occur, it is first important to make sure that he feels safe now.
1in6 — excellent resource on male sexual abuse
Living Well— based in Australia, a wealth of information to help men overcome the trauma of abuse
Male Survivor — to improve the resources and support available to male survivors of all forms of sexual abuse in the U.S. and around the globe
If you feel you are in danger, call 911 immediately!
RESOURCES
POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER:
National crisis hotline: 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453) https://www.childhelp.org/hotline/
The Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline is dedicated to the prevention of child abuse. Serving the U.S. and Canada, the hotline is staffed 24/7 with professional crisis counselors who provide assistance in multiple languages (through interpreters) to childhood and adult victims and those who care about them. All calls are confidential.
"If you’ve been the victim of inappropriate sexual behavior, here’s my best advice: Tell someone. We are social creatures in that we need other people. Nothing is worse than going against the grain of our genetic makeup and locking away a painful secret in a place so deep inside we think no one will find out. It will become a voracious worm eating away at our mind, and it’s just a matter of time before we will cease to function. It isn’t far beyond that, that we will want to die—or even try to die. But that need not happen, if we unburden the deepest hurts of our hearts to someone who cares."
GENERAL INFORMATION ON ABUSE:
Darkness To Light—equipping persons with knowledge and skills to effectively protect children
National Center for Victims of Crime—leading U.S. resource and advocacy organization for crime victims and those who serve them
Prevent Child Abuse America—promoting services to improve child well-being in all 50 states through their state chapters
RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network)—a ton of information, including the Criminal Statute of Limitations by state
Stop It Now!—mobilizing families and communities to take action to protect children before they are harmed
American SPCC (Society for the Positive Care of Children)—their mission: to ensure that every child has a chance to become a happy, healthy, and productive adult.
ChildHelp—Goal is to meet all the needs of abused, neglected, and at-risk children, focusing on prevention, intervention, treatment, and community outreach.
SUICIDE PREVENTION:
If you are in crisis, dial 988—the new toll-free National Suicide Prevention Lifeline—
available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. All calls are confidential.
SAVE (Suicide Awareness, Voices of Education)—“Our work is based on the foundation and belief that suicide is preventable and everyone has a role to play in preventing suicide. Through raising public awareness, educating communities, and equipping every person with the right tools, we know we can SAVE lives.”
The Jason Foundation — “Keeping more than dreams alive”— In memory of 16-year-old Jason Flatt, this foundation helped pass the Jason Flatt Act, the nation’s most inclusive and mandatory youth suicide awareness and prevention legislation pertaining to Teacher’s In-Service Training.
DISCLAIMER: The contents of this website (not including links to other sites which are the responsibility of those site owners) are based on the opinions of David Samarzia, and presented with the understanding that he does not intend to render any type of medical, psychological, legal, or any other kind of professional advice.
PTSD is believed by many experts to be the most common aftereffect of sexual abuse.
PTSD itself has a subset of varying symptoms, which the Mayo Clinic says may include fearful thoughts and bad dreams; also depression, worry, intense guilt, panic attacks, and feeling emotionally numb (dissociation).
However, the most central feature of PTSD is flashbacks. Persons find that their minds constantly jump back and forth between past and present. Anything — even something as minor as walking past a person with long hair, if the perpetrator had long hair — can be a trigger. Not just the memory itself comes back, but so do the emotions connected with that memory, a sort of persistent “re-experiencing” the traumatic events. Those with the disorder would like to be able to turn it off, but cannot. They have to find a way to deal with the constant onslaught of images and overpowering feelings. Those are often accompanied by the “fight or flight” response, a reaction of the autonomic nervous system to the visually invasive images in the mind.
PTSD actually changes the physical properties of the brain. That is, how the left side of the brain, which controls logical thinking, interacts with the right side which controls emotions. When the two sides work together as they are designed to, a person will feel strong emotions when a traumatic event happens. But at some point the brain of a non-PTSD person moves those feelings and memories to the left hemisphere where they are “time-stamped.” After that, the memories aren’t felt as strongly when they come to mind again. With PTSD, the memories stay lodged in the right side of the brain, so any little thing—a word, a smell, a place, an event—triggers the same emotions felt as when the event first happened. Persons with PTSD cannot simply “stop thinking about it” or “get over it.” Telling them to “let it go” is not only unhelpful, it lays another burden of guilt and failure on their shoulders.
Researchers are continually looking for ways to help people with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. A few ways include cognitive therapy, medication, biofeedback, stress inoculation training, exposure therapy, and EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing). Every person is different; therefore, some may be helped by one method, and some by another.
Everyone who lives with PTSD eventually develops his or her own ways of coping. Some ways, like alcohol and illicit drugs, are obviously not good ways. Yet those with this disorder tend to be resilient, strong, and creative people. Over time, and if they have the love and support of people who care, they devise “mental tools” that enable them to function and even thrive, and help make their own little corner of the world a better place.
Resources for PTSD:
U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs—National Center for PTSD:
https://www.ptsd.va.gov/understand/index.asp
American Addiction Centers—information on the link between PTSD and addictions:
https://www.projectknow.com/the-link-between-ptsd-and-alcoholism/
https://americanaddictioncenters.org/co-occurring-disorders/ptsd-addiction
National Institute of Mental Health:
https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/post-traumatic-stress-disorder-ptsd/index.shtml
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD):
David